Ramblings from a Twisted Mind: Drug Filled Baggage?

by SaskMusic

August 4, 2009 in Humour/Commentary

When they said she was caught with drug-filled baggage, I thought they meant Bobby Brown…

When Whitney Houston was caught with half an ounce of marijuana, media attention turned again to the issue of drug abuse in the topsy turvy world of rock. Or maybe the topsy turvy world of schmaltz.

Anyway, I decided to find out if Saskatchewan musicians were using drugs. The musician whose words you are about to read agreed to an interview - as long as I agreed not to reveal his name. What I discovered could shock you. You may want to sit down.

Me: So, you using?

Him: Using what?

Me: Drugs. Do you take drugs?

Him: Constantly.

Me: Wow. What are you taking?

Him: Everything. I got that virus that's going around. Been talking like Kermit the Frog for three weeks, but I have a gig every @#$%$ weekend. So I toss back a shot of Buckley's. Tastes like @$%#%, but it works. Then I take a hit of Chloraseptic, but that stuff never lasts. I keep it beside the stage so I can top up during the show. Between hits, I chew Alpine. Sometimes Max Air. I tried sucking on Sucrets, but I got one down my throat once when I hit a high note, so @#$#% that. After the show, I mellow out with a little Vicks VapoRub.

Me: How long have you had this virus?

Him: Three weeks and counting.

Me: Stop breathing on me.

 

Originally published February 2000.

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